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Sunday, 10 March 2019

I can't make you parent...


"I didn't walk out on our son, I walked out on you"

For 11 long months I have tried to make you parent. For 11 long months I have tried to keep a relationship open for you and our son. For 11 long months I have gone above and beyond to facilitate any contact you wanted with our son. For 11 long months I have put my own happiness last to try and allow you the option to raise our son 50/50 with me. Isn't it sad that you feel our son isn't enough for you to step up and do any of these things without me having to "nag".

In the media you hear so many stories from fathers who are being kept away from their children. In the media you hear so many stories from fathers saying they get the raw end of the deal when a couple with children split. Mothers are called the most awful names. Words like weapon, unfit, narcissist, user, manipulator get thrown around.... yet here I am exhausted from caring because all I want is for my sons father to actually try.

Isn't it sad that in 2019 a parent can take another parent to court due to regular access being denied to them yet in 2019 I am unable to take a parent to court because I want them to have regular access to their child. Apparently in the eyes of the law "you can't make someone parent". Although this fact is true, isn't it sad that I have had to even think or look down this legal route to try and allow my son a good relationship with his father.

How am I still sat here saying that my son's father has managed to see his son for less than 10 hours this week? I will never understand this man. I allow as much access as possible however access only works around his life. When will this man realise work isn't a priority. A new flame isn't a priority. Friends are not a priority. His main priority should be the child he has had in his life for 7 years. 

The weeks that pass him by are weeks where he is missing key moments from his sons life because other opportunities that he feels are important get in the way. As a parent he is missing the happy times, the bad times, the tears, the laughs, the smiles and most importantly every moment that passes is a chance for a memory to be created that he is missing out on. When our son grows up I want his childhood to be blessed with 2 parents in his memories, not just one. I feel helpless.

My sons father manages to make plenty of excuses into why he doesn't do something yet can't make excuses as to why he can do something.

With the words ringing in my ears "I didn't walk out on our son, I walked out on you" it is pretty clear this is not the case. For 11 long months I have tried to make my sons father parent however I know I can't make him. 
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